Until Al-Anon, I was tangled in my son’s life

It is an understatement to say that my life had become unmanageable. My 17-year-old son was abusing drugs and alcohol. I spent night after night wondering what I had done wrong, and what should I be doing differently. It seemed like the more I tried to fix and control him, the worse things became. I would listen in on his phone conversations, spy on him, and raid his room looking for drugs and alcohol; yet continue to clean up his mess and mistakes. I took the fall for his actions.

One day, a dear friend told me I should go to Al-Anon. I was so surprised at my first meeting to hear how many people were telling my story. They, too, had cried night after night, worried that every ambulance or police siren was because of their child. They, too, had worried that their lives were out of control. It hit me that they were using past tense—used to be out of control. I heard how Al-Anon gave them their lives back. I wanted what they had, so I returned to Al-Anon week after week.

The first tool that Al-Anon gave me was the Serenity Prayer. This prayer became my comb to work out the tangles of my life. When I found myself worrying about my son, I said the Serenity Prayer. I was able to separate what I could not change and what I could change. Of course, the only thing I could change was myself. My tangled life was beginning to become untangled. It has been one and a half years since I went to my first meeting, and my life has transformed. I feel like the happiness I now have radiates from every cell of my body, and I can honestly say this is all because of Al-Anon. I am truly grateful.

By Carol B., British Columbia
The Forum, November 2012