
Alcoholism
Affects the Entire Family...Not Just the Alcoholic
How many people
are involved in the life of any one alcoholic? Family, friends, employer,
co-workers… It is important to remember that all these people
are affected by alcoholism—not just the alcoholic. Many of them
spend a lot of time and energy trying to "fix" the alcoholic:
covering up for them, punishing them, taking responsibility for them.
For over 56 years,
Al-Anon Family Groups (including Alateen for younger members) has
been providing help and hope to families and friends of alcoholics.
In non-professional, mutual support meetings, members share their
own experience, strength, and hope to help one another to recover
from the effects of alcoholism.
Living with alcoholism has been described as living on a merry-go-round,
where each family member, friend, and employer plays a role with the
alcoholics in their lives. These behavior patterns are like the script
of a play, repeated over and over, centering on the alcoholic. A player
can learn a new role by attending Al-Anon, gaining understanding of
the disease of alcoholism and how it has affected them. When this
happens, and the person changes their behavior, they are rewriting
the script. There is no guarantee that the alcoholic will change,
but the alternative is staying on the "merry-go-round."
Insanity can be defined as "doing the same thing over and over
and expecting different results." Changing one’s behavior
can be uncomfortable and very difficult to do, but members learn that
they have to take responsibility for themselves and their own recovery.
Whether
the alcoholic is still drinking or not, all family members and friends
are welcome in
Al-Anon. When anyone in a family enters recovery, the
family itself will begin to change.
The Al-Anon Suggested Welcome
says, "The family situation is bound to improve as we apply the
Al-Anon ideas. Without such spiritual help, living with an alcoholic
is too much for most of us. Our thinking becomes distorted by trying
to force solutions, and we become irritable and unreasonable without
knowing it."
Based upon
the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, Al-Anon Family Groups (which
includes Alateen for younger members) provides non-professional, free,
and confidential support for families and friends of alcoholics. Parents,
children, spouses, partners, friends, grandparents, and co-workers
of problem drinkers can find hope and help in Al-Anon/Alateen. There
are over 26,000 Al-Anon and Alateen groups in 131 countries. For more
information about Al-Anon/Alateen in your community, call 1-888-4-AL-ANON
(weekdays, 8 am to 6 pm ET) or visit the Web site, www.al-anon.alateen.org.
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